Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
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