"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
