perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
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