my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
