You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Randomize
