how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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