I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
