you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
