You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
