whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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