Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
