you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
