He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
