so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Randomize