yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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