haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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