I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Randomize
