tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
