THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
