Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
