Just mADE A PArabola og urine
If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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