so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
