just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
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