Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
