Umm I'm too high to move.
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
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