He is an equal opportunity slut.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize