I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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