thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
