OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
