OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I just found a bag of teeth...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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