East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
