he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
