does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
