Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
only you would photoshop your dick
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
