I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
