Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
And my parents said I crawled through the house
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
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