Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
