Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize