I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Randomize
