this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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