I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Remember when I use to call my dick 'the pendulum'
wtf?
It is now the artist formerly known as 'insideyourgirlfriend'
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Randomize
