I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
