4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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