do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
