weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
