butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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