I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
You can't just leave with hair like that
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize
