I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Randomize
