Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize
