i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize